Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Wibbly Wobbly timey wimey


S- The doctor.
L- Who's the doctor?
S- He's the doctor.
D- [0:13] Yep that's me.
S- 'Kay that was scary.
L- No, it sounds like he's replying but he always says that.
D-[0:19] Yes I do.
L-And that.
D- [0:21] Yep and this!
S- He can hear us! Oh my god you can really hear us!
L- Of course he can't hear us! Look. I got a transcript, see? Everything he says. "Yep that's me, yes I do, yep and this, next this, are you gonna read out the whole thing?
D- [0:37]Are you gonna read out the whole thing? (Together)
L- Sorry.
S- Who are you?
D- [0:41] I'm a time traveler, or I was, I'm stuck in 1969.
M- We're stuck! All of space and time he promised me, now I got a job in a shop, I have to support him!
D-Martha!
M- Sorry.
S- I've seen this bit before.
D- [0:55] Quite possibly.
S- 1969, that's where you're talking from?
D- [0:59] 'Fraid so.
S- But you're replying to me! You cant know what I'm gonna say 40 years before I say it!
D- [1:05] 38.
L- I'm getting this down, I'm writing in your bits.
S-How! How is this possible? Tell me.
L- Not so fast!
D-[1:13] People don't understand time its not what you think it is.
S- Then what is it?
D- [1:19] Complicated.
S- Tell me.
D- [1:22] Very complicated
S- I'm clever and I'm listening and don't patronize me because people have died and I'm not happy, tell me!
D- [1:28] People assume that time is a straight progression of cause to effect but actually from a non-linear non-subjected viewpoint it's more like a ball of wibbly-wobbly timey whimey. ...stuff.
S- Yeah I've seen this bit before. You said that sentence got away from you.
D- [1:43] It got away from me, yeah.
S- Next you're gonna say is "Well I can hear you."
D- [1:48] Well I can hear you.
S- This is impossible!
L- No its brilliant!
D- [1:52] Well not hear you exactly but I know everything you're gonna say.
L- Always gave me the shivers that bit.
S- How can you know what I'm gonna say?
D-[2:00] Look to your left.
L- What does he mean by "look to your left"? I've written tons about that on the forum. I think it's a political statement!
S- He means you! What are you doing?
L- I'm writing in your bits, that way I gotta a complete transcript! What till this hits the net! This will explode the Egg Forums!
D-[2:19] I've got a copy of the finished transcript its on my autocue.
S- How can you have a copy of the finished transcript? It's still being written!
D- [2:25] I told you I'm a time traveler I got it in the future.
S- Ok let me get my head around this. You're reading aloud from a transcript of a conversion you're still having?
D- [2:22] Wibbly wobbly timey whimey.
S- Never mind that, you can do short hand?
L- So?
D- [2:41] What matters is we can communicate, we've got big problems now. They have taken the blue box haven't they? The angels have the phone box?
L- "The angels have the phone box" that's my favorite. I've got that on a t-shirt.
S- What do you mean angels? You mean those statues things?
D- [2:55] Creature from another world.
S- But they're just statues!
D- [2:59] Only when you see them.
S- What does that mean?
D- [3:02] The lonely assassins they used to be called. No one quite knows where they came from but they're as old as the universe or very nearly and they have survived this long because they have the most perfect defense system ever evolved. They are quantum locked. They don't exist when they're being observed. The moment they are seen by any other living creature they freeze into rock. No choice, it's a fact of their biology. In the sight of any living thing they literally turn to stone, and you cant kill a stone. 'Course, a stone cant kill you either but then you turn your head away, then you blink and oh yes it can.
S- Dont take your eyes off that.
D- [3:37] That's why they cover their eyes. They're not weeping, they cant risk looking at each other. They're greatest asset is they're greatest curse. They can never be seen. Loneliest creatures in the universe. And I'm sorry, I'm very, very sorry its up to you now.
S- What am I supposed to do?
D- [3:56] The blue box, that's my time machine. There's a world of time energy in there they could feast on forever but the damage they could do could switch off the sun. You have got to send it back to me.
S- How? ...HOW?!
D- [4:10] And that's it I'm afraid, there's no more from you on the transcript, that's the last I've got. I don't know what stopped you talking but I can guess. They're coming. The angels are coming for you but listen; your life could depend on this. Don't blink, don't even blink! Blink and you're dead. They're fast, faster than you can believe. Don't turn your back, don't look away, and don't blink! Good Luck.



Thursday, December 17, 2009

So I was going to try something

I was going to copy one of my old blogs from December 2006, but I couldn't understand my self, and it was just me being really angry at Mat Smith.

So I figure, I would copy one from before High School Graduation in stead a trip down Memory Lane.

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

End of the Road, beining of the Journey, so long and thanks for all the fish

Current mood: rejuvenated

There are places I remember, all my life, though some have changed Some forever not for better, some have gone and some remain

All these places have their moments, with lovers and friends, I still can recall

Some are dead and some are living, in my life, I've loved them all

But of all these friends and lovers, there is no one compares with you

And these memories lose their meaning, when I think of love as something new

Though I know I'll never lose affection, for people and things that went before

I know I'll often stop and think about them, in my life I love you more

Though I know I'll never lose affection, for people and things that went before

I know I'll often stop and think about them, in my life I love you more, in my life I love you more

Here I am 1 month, 21 days until the rest of my life. Which I might add that not going too badly at the time being, even though my Father is in the hospital and I still have no date to prom and I'm still a lonely old fool. For toughs of you that don't know a few weeks ago I left home only to return three days later, but still I did it and I prove my point. And that point is don't let your parents crush your dreams, even In high school you can still do amazing things I guess it's true actions do speck louder than words. It's not what you say; it's what you do that defines you. I under stand that now more than ever. I know that some people hate, others think I'm a pig, and then there are the ones that actually mean something to me, The people I know that are here for me now and always will be. The friendships I have will last a life. It's these friendship that have pulled and some times carried me through this past school. I feel my shell breaking and armor fading, and that I will no longer beheld back by this prison that I've made my self. I know why I can never get close to anyone, when I start to; I do something to push them away. I know people snicker as I walk by, well fuck you, I'm sorry that I like to flirt. When I flirt people think it's weird, but then someone else like my great friend Josh Burton flirts with the same girls, he's all over them, and they don't care but when I give someone a complement they just look at me like I'm crazy, WHAT WOULD YOU PREFER, ME GRABBING AT EVERY CURVE?!?!?!?!?! I try and am nice. Nice guys finish last, right? Now I don't know what to do to get me out of this slum, I just wish that the young ladies that I go to school with, would wake up and stop getting their hearts broken every other week. Must good looking guys are assholes and treat women like crap. But they don't care they're hot unlike my self and others like me. I assume that they don't understand that guys like me, try harder to make you happy, and would be willing to do anything to get you stay and another plus you don't have to worry about us cheating on you. Now it is time to look about on the year. ..:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" />Decatur Central High School never have I even meant a more retched hive of scum and villainy. Wow the past year has had some wicked shit happen to me this year. I've meant people new and old, seen the love that I've needed for along time, someone to show me the person that I'm going to be or already am. I've made new friends and I've lost friends. I've worked my ass off and still saw a production that should have and could have been better if people would have been off book when they should have been at have been off book for hell week, but No. I don't mean to be mean and I apologize for my rudeness. I guess I'm just used to having productions up to status Que. I will give my class a hand you kick 6th's ass. I was involved with HUSH so you can make as much fun of me as you want, even though that set did kick ass. Tech placed second in state once again, go us, Band placed second, The color guard went to state for the first time in like 13 years, and the drum line went to state, so fine arts kicked major ass. Even Captain America died, you can't kill Cap when your country is in a middle of a losing war, they took away one of my Icons the only symbol in have left just ripped a way. Now my grades are not where I would like them to be, but that's fine. To be honest I'm terrified about Graduation, Life as I know it will change this is the last time I'll ever get to see the majority ever again. Then come the end of Aug. I'm going to be living in Florida for school. Over all my time at DCHS has been well spent, even though the past four year went by so fast, I would never want to go back and change anything that I've done, I'm proud of all my friend, we've made it, and to my friends still in school, please enjoy it. Even we times are down, just remember these words, enjoy it, spend as much time as possible with your friends, and don't ever forget what they mean to you, You'll ever replace these memories. Look forward and remember my name. Well DCHS it's been a ride, and it's my turn to get off, so long and thanks for all the fish, see you at graduation.

Sincerely,

David Aaron West

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Not much of an update

I just love this final scene form Californication Season three, You can watch it and not really be spoiled

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

(500) Days of Summer or A side of my life I've never seen on Celluloid?

Now I can't really call this a review because it's more like kindred spirits. I know I know Sounds lame. GET OFF MY BACK! but anyway, if any one movie could tell the story of David West and it not be about me, It would be (500) Days of Summer. I'm sure the Film Connects with every Hopeless Romantic out there, but I see so much of my self in Joseph Gordon- Levitt's character, just only if he was a bit more Nerdy (even tho he did see him self as Han Solo) and I was thinner. But he even with him taking a job to just pay bills and it not being what he dreams of doing. To one day seeing life in a whole new way and opening his eyes to the world around him after he's had his heart broken. Not to Mention I'm in love with Zooey Deschanel as well

If anything it's just been motivational to no belief. I wish I could find words to describe how this film has made me feel, besides fantastic. I've been right where he is many times before. And Even from the looks of what going on in my life right now, I feel I'm closing in on the point in my life where Joseph's character ends up at the end of the film. I can't even begin to talk about all the parallels with this movie and my life. It's nuts, but ok I'm done creaming over this movie for now. I wanted to be able to write a review on it, but maybe after I watch it again I can do a proper one.

Monday, December 7, 2009

There's always something to look at if you open your eyes!

Not much to say at the moment, but alot of things are happening! That good old David West luck might finally be changing.

The New Year is Looking brighter and brighter

Some people live more in twenty years than others do in eighty. It's not the time that matters, it's the person.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Song For Ten

Well I woke up today
And the world was a restless place
It could have been that way for me

And I wandered around
And I thought of your face
That Christmas looking back at me

I wish today was just like every other day
'Cause today has been the best day
Everything I ever dreamed

And I started to walk
Pretty soon I will run
And I'll come running back to you

'Cause I followed my star
And that's what you are
I've had a merry time with you

I wish today was just like every other day
'Cause today has been the best day
Everything I ever dreamed

So have a good life
Do it for me
Make me so proud
Like you want me to be
Where ever you are
I'm thinking of you oceans apart
I want you to know

Well I woke up today and you're on the other side
Our time will never come again
But if you can still dream
Close your eyes it will seem
That you can see me now and then

I wish today was just like every other day
'Cause today has been the best day
Everything I ever dreamed

I wish today was just like every other day
'Cause today has been the best day
Everything I ever dreamed

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

"These Are the Voyages"

" These Are the Voyages of the Star ship Enterprise

It's continuing mission to explore strange new worlds,

to seek out new life and civilizations,

To Boldly Go Where No Man Has Gone Before"

Captains Log

Star Date: 63366.1

So were do I begin,

I guess an update on my diet is in order, well Like most people figured I haven't done the Best I could with it, Mainly because no would take it seriously, and since I still depend on my parents for food and such, and they have no faith in me, and keep buying food I ask them not to, but ok when they don't buy me the foods I ask for its kinda hard, I'm still trying to walk/run my 3miles daily and work out, but With that I also lacked motivation, It's mainly because I would love a work out partner, someone to shape my self up against. So where I'm getting at is that, after the holidays I'm starting Fresh. I'm still going to do this so called half-assed routine, but I'm ready to go full Force, which Leads me in to my next point to make on this days fun filled blog.

So I'm no longer on Speaking terms with Jackie, believe me it's not for the lack trying to talk to her, But Fuck I Fucked up. I know that. I had a moment of weakness and let my emotions get the best of me. I went to her to vent to, and I guess she didn't like what I Had to say. I know I took what she said and Blew it out of the water, so I made some wrong choices after I blew up, and she said she didn't want to continue this friendship then the following morning, I did nothing but try to talk to her and get right with her. Then she told me to stop contacting her, and I just responded "well fuck you to then, and why did I even bother with you in the first place." not the best choice in words. So

fuck my life, right now I don't want anything then to talk to her, I know I'm the worst fucking friend in the whole world. Quick Question, to EVERYONE, am I really that hard to be friends with?


Jackie,

If you are reading this, I'm sorry, I was pissed when I had no reason to be and said things I didn't mean. If we don't talk, I don't want it to be like this. We are both adults and I'm ready to act like it.




Ok On to other News I only have about 20 Pages left in my note book that I've been keeping for 4 years come April. It's a weird Feeling, when it's done I don't want to keep it so If there are any takers on this, please let me know, and I'll give it to you. Basically anything that

you could ever want to know, about me it's in there, things I've never told anyone you can find out in here, it's a chapter in my life that I'm closing when this book is done.

Thanks For the Time

And Thanks for being there for me.

- David West


Thursday, November 12, 2009

My BIG 50th POST: WARNING CONTAINS HARSH IMAGES

Besides still not working nothing much going on in my life right now thats really anything to talk about, So I have to make my life a little interesting.


So the guys over on the Jinxworld forum started a Little thread call,

"How overweight are you, and do you care?"

And this got me really thinking, I read through the entire thread and It really inspired me to finally do something about it. My weight has always bugged me and has caused me to have some huge self-esteem issues, that I mainly try to keep to my self. But it's time that I fix this, I'm not looking to get ripped or anything I just want to slim down and feel good about the way I look, Now I've always been a big guy so I'm use to being large but In my opinion I don't look to bad for my weight I'm about 310 pounds 6ft tall, now I've seen people that weigh about the same and are about the same hight as me and look alot worse. I would like my goal to be about 260 by the end of January

Now I really don't have a clear plan on doing this but for the last two days, I've walked/ Jogged about 3 miles a day, I plan on doing this on a daily basis, I'm cutting soda out of my daily intake as well as my late night snacking. I would love to be able to be able to jog or even run the entire length buy the end of the month if that is at all possible. I'm still going to be doing this for sure over the weekend, while coming up with a workout that is right for me.

Here are a few Pictures to give you nightmares so Turn Back now if you want to save you're eyes, I'm going to be doing this about once a week or once every two week to give you all a visual update.










GO NOW!!! SAVE YOUR SOUL!!!!











A Song For the wait.













LAST CHANCE










PhotobucketPhotobucket

You were warned

Sunday, November 8, 2009

oops used that title before = 49

so, life... Yeah Life. Hooray
the Last few days have been really fun yet still very depressing, I've hung out with the best friends a guy could ask for, but something is missing. I'm just tired of being Single, Tired of not having any money, tired of living my life this way. I feel Like a fucking bum.
Tonight was good tho, I got to see Momma Rieberg, gave her a few big Hugs, which was nice, but I think seeing her just made me miss her more, but her production of Godspell was really good, great cast!!!

Monday, November 2, 2009

I'm Bored out of my mind= 48!

Hopefully I have a job by the end of week, because well I need money and I bored to death. Hell I'm so bored I cleaned my room, yeah I should have done it months ago but I didn't. I've applied to every job I can think of, that has an online application. I've e-mail my resumes out to more place then I can count, I need something!!! BIG TIME. I shaved my head and I really wish I wouldn't have, at least my hair grows quick, but I fucking miss it. =( And the only reason I did it was because I was in a hurry and couldn't get it to do what I wanted it to. So I got pissed off and cut it all off. Go Me. Short sweet, nothings really going on in my life, well besides the normal money issues and the every growing loneliness. So at this rate my 50th post is going to be kinda lackluster.

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

if you're lost you can look and you will find me

Well I'm pretty sure I have some kind of sleeping disorder, I can only get a few hours of sleep at a time, not fun. But To my point of this today, Have you ever liked someone and they don't share the same feelings for you that you do them. Well thats the story of my life, ad not that it's a bad thing, and I can't hold that against them. I've made some bad choices when it comes to my actions with relationship. Mainly when it comes to speaking my mind. When I have feelings for someone I'm not afraid to say any, now is that a bad thing? I don't know. But for the first time, I honestly would do anything for this person just not to lose her as a friend. Part of me hates the fact that I can't keep my feelings to myself then again, usually only bring it up to make them feel better, but then it goes from being me trying to help, to me basically making a fool out of my self, and instead of making things better, I make them worse. I'm not upset I just wish there was something that I could do that would make it better. My feelings here don't really matter, I would love to be able to move on, but I've tried and I just end up in the same spot time after time. I just have a way of picking them I guess. Why is it that a guy like me with an unwavering moral code that live my life by can't seem to get a head in life, I'm good guy, right? So why is it when I try to help the people I care about, I make it worse for them.

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Love, Nathaniel Is coming on in a few!!!

Just about a half hour and I'll finally have it on-line, so those of you that have been waiting for it can finally see it, there are still a few things that I want to change, but I need to re import the footage and I'm not in the mood to do so, lol I'm lazy.

UPDATE

It's Here, two months later but it's here



Thursday, October 22, 2009

FUCK WALMART


So As you can tell I lost my job at Wal*mart, So I jokingly called a coworker a bitch. To me this wasn't that bad, but the Bitch Manger can suck a big one. The event happened over a month ago, so I can't believe it took them this long, and it seems that someone just reported it about a week and half to two weeks ago. And on top of all the great luck I've had this week this was just the worst of the bunch. No instead of having bills and having money to pay them, now I'm back to having bills and no money. The whole thing is just stupid, I can sit there and be called a " Fucking Dumb Ass" and nothing happens to them, But no I bust my ass every time I was there and I get fired over some so simple. The Managers say that they look out for Wal*mart associates to the best they can, and that they're respect it the most important thing. Well fuck Wal*mart only a few of the Managers ever showed me any respected and none of the other even took the time to talk to me, The first time I talked to the Manager that fired me was Tuesday when she asked for my report on what had happened, So she had no Judge of Character. They don't me and what they have was out of context. Now I had asked to say good bye to everyone before leaving, and when I told everyone they were all shocked and asked why and when I started to tell them, the bitch manager came over and stopped me, then I got pissed and stormed off, then escorted out of the building.

I don't know why this upset me as much as it did yesterday, but It could actually be a good thing, at least now I wont get stuck there, and Maybe just happen to find a job that allows me to have a social life and not mention farther my career with took a back seat to me getting my bill caught up. The only reason I didn't blog about it yesterday is because I spent most of the Afternoon bitching to people. I was pretty rough right after it happened. So I called people to cheer me up. =)

Monday, October 19, 2009

Got to love that David West Luck.

I have the worst luck when it comes to money and Most of that is my fault, but I paid $500 on my Credit Card to day because I thought I had the money, I couldn't get on to my online checking account for reasons I don't know. But I'm usually pretty good at keeping track of my funds with out checking my balance. But the Payment went through on the credit card so I was like "yay" one step closer to being out of Debt. But later in the day I was trying to by buy some theater tickets around a Hundred Bucks total, and it kept saying that there was some kind of error, so I figured I would try again. When I got to work I went to grab a drink and some chap stick, and my card got declined for a grad total of $3.00, So I'm kinda freaking out right now, mainly because I can't check my accounts and I can only imagine what the over draft charges would be on that credit card payment, but hopefully I just have a set daily limit on my bank account and not broke, which I don't think I am. But I'm getting up in the morning to go to my bank and have a little chat. But Go Me! Got to love that David West Luck.

In other news my mom is doing just fine, she had her lady parts taken out earlier this week, and me and my dad are still sane, or as much as I can be any way. We got a few new people at work, one is a cool guy, but the other one is FUCKING useless And gets in the way, I'm sorry I know he's new but still the guy has no work ethic. Not to mention I've never meant anyone who has ever smelled so bad of cigarettes in my life. Enough of me Bitching about this guy I could just go on forever. So I'm not going to lie I'm kinda feeling really bummed about my money situation, but at the same time I'm feeling good, I'm getting out on my days off hanging out with friends. Playing D&D Saturday really felt good, I got to reconnect with a few old friends and got to meet a few a new ones, so that was nice. Then it's now less then two months until I get to see Jackie again, Can't wait!!! It's felt like forever. I have this coming weekend off but from the looks of it no money to anything. I do have Halloween off and I'm going to a Halloween Party, Don't really have any costume Ideas, I would love to go as the Doctor but lack the clothing.


12:03 pm
awesomeness so I get everything worked out with my bank account, only to have someone call and tell me I have $1700 by the end of the month on a credit card I believed to have had paid off last December, What I don't get is why I hadn't gotten any mail about this, a phone call before Now! anything to let me know I was getting charged. God why does life Hate me so.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Encounter at Farpoint

I hate not being able to move on. It's hard to explain but at time when my life isn't looking as up as it should and I get depressed my mind just keeps telling me to do one thing but I feel like I need to do another. Now one thing I know for certain and I have it all worked out in my head finally but My path of self rediscovery is needing a push. I wanted to come back here and reconnect with my friends but most of them are away so thats kinda not going so well. And I'm missing someone beyond belief. Not much more to say and it's 5:20am so I'm going to hit the sack.

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Well, you went uptown ridin' in your limousine With your fine Park Avenue clothes You had the Dom Perignon in your hand And the spoon up your nose

So got to give me credit, I'm handling my current girl situation better then I would have thought. It Sucks not going to lie. I just wish she could see how much a douche her boy friend is. She's an awesome person and can do so much better, and I'm not saying me, but damn the guy is a controlling bastard. The guy just pisses me, alright get over it your girl friend has male friends that she wants to hang out with but can't because you wont let her. And not to mention he completely killed my trust with her in a way, because He's read our text messages, and found I like her, all the shit she's said about it him, and the fact I think he's a cock ass. So I can't help it if I'm hesitant on telling her anything. Just need to vent, thanks for listening.

Monday, September 28, 2009

Wild Beaver Saloon






Someone told me long ago, there clam before the storm.

Sorry for the lack of up dates, I've been way to tired. Thursday I had some of the most fun I've had in sometime, And it's a good feeling when people come to see the work that you've done and get a reaction like we did, and it wasn't even the final edit. And it's that trill that make me love this life, now I just have to figure out a way to get that to happen more often and I'll keep you posted on the Air Date.

So on to Life

To be honest isn't that bad, I have money coming in now, still no social life to speak of, and I'm still having Girl issues. Not bad girl issues, just I like really like someone and they do know this and we keep talking alot, but the catch is she has a boy friend. I don't know what going on. And how he can't be getting pissed that we are talking this much. Like it goes against my moral code to have even told her I liked her while she has a bf. I don't want to be the one to break them up. But like I'm being strait forward to her with how I feel, and she seems to like it. So I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place.




Saturday, September 12, 2009

One thing lead to another we were young And we would scream together songs unsung

I've got some big plans set in motion and some big ideas. It's just going to take some time. So hopefully I can get out of this depressed state I've been in for the past month. I guess it's good that I have hope. Lets make it happen Captain!

Friday, September 11, 2009

Sympathy for the Devil - Supernatural Season Premiere (SPOILERS)

Supernatural did what it does best, it brought you to the edge of your seat right away. Picking up right where the lack luster Season 4 finally left off. Sam and Dean find them selves right in front of the open devils gate, from here the thrills never stop. The tension is strong between two brothers, seeing how things will play out with Sam and Dean will be interesting. At the end of Last season we saw them torn apart by Sam's decisions, that eventually lead to Sam releasing Lucifer from the pit. The title of the Premiere really suits the episode, it introduces you to Lucifer's host, a man in his mid 30's who's wife and family were brutally murdered, the devil promises him justice for what God has done. This premiere sets up quite a few interesting plot lines, including Dean being the Chosen host of the Angel Michael, Dean and Sam going their separate ways, the return of the demon Meg, and the suggestion of a Higher power then the angels on the Side of our Heroes. I'f You've never watched Supernatural this is not a jumping on point at all, but Season Four is on dvd now, you can pick it up and be on you're way, but if you're like me start from season one and become a fan of one of the most cinematic shows on television.
For a full episode description Go here

http://www.tv.com/supernatural/sympathy-for-the-devil/episode/1279927/recap.html?tag=episode_recap;recap

Then you got to love Ninja Video
for the full episode and full series

http://www.ninjavideo.net/video/39814

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Do you remember when we use to dance, and incidence arose from circumstance

So it's been a fun few weeks, not really, It sucks because I would really like to keep this going, there I was going at it ever day because I had something to tell. Here recently there hasn't been anything really tell worthy. And I mean this in a day to day basis, because lord knows I have stories to last a life time and I wish to tell the world all of them I can. Know there have been a few personal things that have happened but for once I'm not telling the world my problems. I'll just have to deal with them my self. Think of it as a Crisis of Faith, but when someone like me, who doesn't believe in god has a Crisis of faith what is it. Am I really the person I think I am, do my morals still stand, does the way I think of my self with my friends still hold as relevant now that everyone has gone our separate ways. At one point I would be at any of your sides at a moments notice, no matter the distance, and I've always have tried to be the friend that you all deserve. So if I've seemed different this past week or so, it's because I've really been thinking about this, It's a code I've lived by for years and part of it feels like it's been shattered.

Ah work at 4pm - 1am lovely.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

One look from you and I would fall from grace

So Life suck right now, or should I say the lack there of. There really isn't anything new in my life at all it's boring. I'm just trying to told on to the things that make me sane. I really need to do something thats not work. I need just get away for a while. With out any contact with people, nothing to worry me. I thought coming back to Indy would help me find my self again but I was wrong. Yeah you are my muse but I can't stay here.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

I'm tired oh so very tired

Not just because Walmart, which isn't that bad I like the people I'm working with defiantly a group of characters, but Life right now is just making me tired. I need that one thing to brighten up the world and actually make it worth my time. I have no clue what it could be, maybe a social life which is out of the question because of my working hours at walmart. Maybe I just need to get the fuck out of Indy. Which I'll be a few hundred closer to now that I'm not going to go up to Michigan any time soon. So my plan is to save up about $4000 and get the hell out of here. It's sad I'm only 21 and don't see my self having fun anytime so, and I know I still young but I feel so old. I'm out of school, while most of my friends are still going, it's difficult. It's like my life is kicking me in my ass and I can't get moving. Alot of the time I compare my self to the Doctor, I see my self taking my friends and escaping to worlds unknown, but in reality of sorts I need the Doctor for my self, I need some adventure in my life.

Saturday, August 29, 2009

Way to Fall

Alright so my first day at walmart wasn't to bad I think I might actually like the job, I didn't spend hardly anytime on the sales floor, even though yesterday I did spend most of my time on a computer doing training things. But I'm going to spend most of it my time there in the back unloading stuff off the trucks, and after that in done separating begins, then after that we take out the pallets to the floor, for third shift to put on the selves. Now it isn't a job I want to do to long but it's giving me a work out and the people are a riot. The funny thing is I'm getting worn out when there are a few older ladies ladies doing it to and they didn't get phased, while I started to have a hard time. They put me to shame, lol. The only really bad thing was I couldn't get to sleep until like 4am which really sucked So I slept almost all day and here in a few I have to get ready and do it all again.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

eh

Alright this is fucking brutal, I'm working the next two weeks strait with the exceptions of Tuesdays and Wednesdays, but it's from 4pm - 1am, so say long to talking and hanging out with any friends, hopefully after I'm there for a while I'll be able to switch to 3rd shift or something that way I'll have some interaction with friends. The Really shitty thing is I currently don't know when I'm going to be able to work on the this documentary, hopefully I can talk to BHH and get something worked out so maybe we can shoot some of these things in the morning before I have to be at work. Oh well but at least I do get to days off a week that are back to back. It will give me some time to get stuff done.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Well, that's the thing about you humans. You can always see something that's invisible, but if it's staring you right in the face - nope, can't see it

6:30P.M. ish

Todays just been another one of these days, it wouldn't be to bad if I could just get out and do something. I mean It was nice going to lunch with my mom, but I need more human interaction. God I can't wait to start working even if I don't like it I just need out of this rut I'm in, Usually being back home I'm inspired to do more, to be great, but that inspiration is gone from this place. It's like I'm falling in to a black hole and Can't seem to escape it. Today I decided to write in my Note book again first time in to months, it was like a friend long gone, one that I was hoping never to talk to again, I have so many bad memories wrapped up in it that and some good ones in there to I guess. But it's an interesting little read if you want to get in to my head, and only one person has ever read it, and thats just because I was a mess and didn't have my head on strait. Now if I find someone I trust as well as I did them, When It's filled up I let them have a go. Now it's over 3 and a half years of my life wrapped up into it the little thing but if you would like a read let me know, I'm going to try and write in as much as possible the next few months until its full, I would like for it to be filled by the new year. But like I said If you want to read it when it's all said and done let me know.

11:44P.M.

Well, I had just closed my computer and never finished posting so Instead of just rewriting the above, I just figured make two different entries.

So around 6:30ish Andrew came over. I was good to hang out with him again before he went off to school tomorrow, at least I know he'll be home for the weekend and stuff so hopefully I'll have them off, but you never know at least not until tomorrow. But Andrew took me out to White Castle and the to see Inglorious Bastards, which was Fantastic, I love Tarantino's Dialog in every movie and this was no exception and a good change from his pulp culture filled dialog in his others. But this was the first movie I've seen in theaters since Harry Potter over a Month ago. I use to go all the time, one of the nice perks of working at one at the time. But even at school If there was a movie I wanted to go see I did. But that besides the point I guess one reason people hadn't been calling me to hang out was because they though I was shooting all week, when I have only done two days, SO YES I"M FREE, but not tomorrow because I'm am working. the only day this week that I have been. but Hanging out with my buddy was good, It made me feel better, just need to keep this up.

Now I have to get to sleep I have to be up early,

talk to you again soon

To graphic? I think so

http://www.parentdish.com/2009/08/25/will-bloody-texting-psa-get-the-message-to-teens/?icid=main|htmlws-main|dl7|link3|http://www.parentdish.com/2009/08/25/will-bloody-texting-psa-get-the-message-to-teens/



Now I'm guilty of doing both, but I see talking on your cell phone no differently then talking to someone else in your. Texting on the hand yeah I should do it, because I know I don't pay as close attention to the road as I should, I try to to reply back to them while driving, but I will read them, and I try to keep that to only when I'm stopped at a light or something. And it seems that every time I drive I almost get into like three accidents because people don't pay attention. I think everyone could pay more attention.

Now as far as it being too graphic for TV, yeah I really think it is, something like this should be left to schools, I don't mind them using it, but just to be on TV I think is a little to much. They did a fantastic job at going for the emotional impact, and I really liked it. I could be used for alot of good, even just cutting the video down, and leave out the baby and the little kid, and then maybe use it on TV, but to me it's a little much.


Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Well... you could do that. Yeah, you could do that. Of course you could! But why? Look at these people, these human beings. Consider their potential!

From the day they arrive on the planet, blinking, step into the sun, there is more to see than can ever be seen, more to do than- no, hold on. Sorry, that's The Lion King. But the point still stands: Leave them alone!


Again not much to say, spent the morning with Mat, and we worked out, then walked alot today, and got a sun burn doing so. Now beside that nothing at all. Sorry for the lack of news but what can I say. It's been a rather lacking week. I need something big to happen, soon. Hopefully in a few day we can get back to working on the Documentary. The band hasn't called us, I'm going to give them a ring Thursday and find out what's going down. I wish I had more to say but today was good, I didn't get depressed or anything it was good.